Welcome to our second installment of wereallmaddhere.com/tv.
Sorry about the crap sound quality but it was blowing a gale,not so good for filming but great exfoliation for ones legs...;)
Hehehe...just slightly short of the water babe!
Could not have planned that if I tried! J9 ;)
 
 
Why hello there!
Today's ramble is one I have been thinking a lot about lately,it involves my children & sometimes my husband & the fact that the better I get to know them all,the more I realise I think I have created idiots...if life were really survival of the fittest they wouldn't last 5mins!
I love them all dearly or something,something & have had a great laugh remembering all the stupid things they have done that made this list below,so with no further ado I present to you a list of some of the crazy things my family have done...

-miss A has no idea of just how dangerous electricity can be I realised as I watched her about to put a knife into a plugged in toaster...(this was fairly recently)

-mr B once thought it would be a tasty treat to eat the moisture absorbing beads he received with some other present

-mr M was banned from riding his moto bike after repeatedly using the car to stop instead of the brakes

-miss N doesn't bother to unwrap the lollies before she eats them,down the hatch plastic wrapping & all

-Mr Fixit recently tried to kill us all by nearly feeding us green potato mash,dude green potatoes are poisonous!

-miss A honey,your breakfast cereal does not go in your nose,that thing was wedged in there good I tells ya!

-I can't remember who it was that drank a whole glass of straight cordial but really folks how do you not realise that shits not been watered down...

-mr S what is it with him & plastic bags on his head? A fetish perhaps? Geez!

-mr B recently wrapped his head in sticky tape,like dude you didn't think that through did ya? Ouch!

-miss N why would you deliberately poke yourself in the eye? Why?

-miss A babe please don't force your head through the veranda railing bars,it's very, very hard to get it back out again & the oil we had to use to lube your ears up was a bitch to get out of your hair...

-miss N if mummy says its hot,please don't touch it to check,yes it is hot & people burn!

-miss N again! Please don't headbutt things to see just how hard they are,the table is very hard darling just ask!

-all the small kids have a thing for the cats butt,do not touch the cats ring hole,he does not like it & there's no soap in the world that's gunna make me eat anything that your manky little hands have touched ever again!

-miss N has a thing for using her undies as a pocket,you do NOT want to know what I have found in there!

That's the list for today but I sure there will be plenty to add as the kids keep growing!
Tell me what things have your family or friends done that makes you think WTF?
J9 ;)
 
 
Hey people's,sorry it's been so long between posts but you know me,I'm nothing if not inconsistent...so anyway,today I thought I would show you a video we made.If your at all familiar with Bam my 6yr old you will be well aware that he is YouTube obsessed,so this is his first episode of we're all madd here TV...He is so going to be a presenter of some type maybe?
Is anyone in your household obsessed with anything?
Don't forget we're all madd here,as if the video didn't remind you...;)
 
 
It has taken me a few weeks to finally get my head around the fact that I have successfully raised a child into adulthood.
It has been a rollercoaster of emotions,pride,disbelief,sadness,joy & everything in between...but coming out the other side of this big event & it is a big event,I feel love,great big special love that my daughter,the tiny little screaming (trust me she was a screamer) baby I brought home from the hospital all those years ago has grown & blossomed into the most amazing adult,more amazing than I could ever have imagined.
To celebrate this momentous occasion it was decree'd that as we are "we're all madd here" she would celebrate with a mad hatter's tea party!
Being the lunatic that I am most of the time,I had a vision of how I wanted this tea party to be,it was to be a pretty girly party where they could all have fun & be girls for one last time before adulthood swallowed up all of their innocence.
I grabbed the iPad & proceeded to storm my way through the Internet gathering the bits & pieces I needed to make this party happen! (a special thanks to eBay & the local buy,swap & sell page on facey)
We had a fairy floss machine that mr fixit proudly manned all day,a help yo self lolly stand,a photo booth with props,games like hula hoops,bubbles & badminton,pass the parcel & pin the tail on the donkey & gorgeous thank you gifts of mismatched china tea cups & saucers with retro collectible spoons & choccy's in them.
So below I present you with Abby's 18th mad hatters tea party,where a fine time was had by all & the backyard was empty of guests by 6pm (winning!)
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The gorgeous birthday girl in her awesome Indian headress given to her by her special friends...
Just to top off a couple of great weeks we got the news that Abby has been accepted into wollongong uni early entry for law,commerce & international studies!she got all 3 degree's she applied for!
She has worked so hard to achieve this & deserves it so much,congratulations honey we are so,so very proud of all you are! (I think a lawyer in the family may be a good thing judging her younger brothers wild behaviours)
So contrary to popular belief you can be "we're all madd here" & make real life work for you too!
Signing off today as the proudest mumma in the stratosphere...;)
 
 
Today's funny moments included...
Miss Nyx who is 2 came out this morning with a razor shaving her chin,just like daddy...thank goodness it still had its safety cover on!
Mr Spy 4 surprised me with a finger puppet play but the puppets were tampon wrappers he had popped on his fingers,what fun!
& then to top it off,I took miss Nyx to the toilet & a panty liner fell out of her pants...wtf?
After having a giggle I have come to the conclusion that children have no regard for personal space,I should be glad miss Nyx was shaving her face, not something else & feminine hygiene products are a really cheap way to entertain the kids!
I also need more privacy around this place,pronto!
Also don't forget we're all madd here,not that you'd ever guess...
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It's a puppet! No its not buddy,can't wait to show you this when your a bit older...
 
 
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My head feels a bit like this today!
Today's post is me writing down some of the thoughts that are swirling around in my head,please bare with me & please if you have any advice it would be greatly appreciated...

Why did I just eat 2 bowls of leftovers for breakfast?I wasn't even hungry...

Should I send mr4 to school next year,I think he is ready but does he?

Mr16 & I are going through another rough patch,I know it will all work out the way it's meant too but it is hard to communicate with him & finding the right time to talk is very hard at we're all madd here!

I am so sick of worrying about money,I try very hard not to do this but it gets harder & harder...

I worry that miss17 is making uni choices based on the fact that we don't have much money,I don't want her to do that! I don't want our financial situation to affect her fantastic potential & potentially change the course of her life...

I'm hating my lack of motivation in regards to the running of the were all madd here house,I need to step up a notch,I know it but can't seem to find the right gear...

I worry a lot about mr6's behaviours at home,particularly his addiction to any attention is good attention & his ways of getting it...

Will the car pass rego this year without a million dollars having to be spent on it?

I worry about mr fixit,real life is wearing out his sunny disposition as well...

I wish summer would hurry the fuck up...

I'm hating the Australian mainstream media at the moment,instead of celebrating that our Olympic athletes have done a fantastic job just to be at the games,they put them down for not winning gold,it's selfish,greedy & sets a very bad example for our kids,this is why I hate commercialism in sport,it ruins it!

I want to be able to sew like a mofo,so I can bring my ideas to life but really,could I be bothered...

I'm worried about my mothers health,she only tells me what she wants me to know,I know she holds back...

I'm sick of always feeling like the bad guy...

The school must have heard me bitching about the half yearly reports,they sent a survey home...I'm gunna survey the fuck out of that thing!

I want a 20 kilo washing machine...

I'm totally green with envy reading all the blog posts of Aussie bloggers at a blogging conference in New York,I could rock that shit as well,I know it!

Mr4 keeps talking about being on tv,should I have kept that appointment with the talent agency?

Uncle Toby's museli bars are shrinking,every time I buy them I'm sure they are smaller...

I want to quit this shit everyday but you can't motherhood is for life...

I want a holiday,a long holiday, by myself...did you know I'm officially to old to go on a contiki tour? Fuck you contiki,old people are cool too...

O.k that's enough...for now! Love you all,it will all be o.k,eventually,I know that but my brain still carries on with it's crap...j9 x
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Yeah,something like that...
 
 
It's easier to become than you think...
After moving to "the house that love bought" which involves 7 people & recently 2 cats,I have decided that I am not one of those lovely housewives from the fifties, who looks as though she enjoys every minute of shining that sink & scrubbing that dunny (I also think there is a reason Valium was routinely givin to these women in particular).I am in fact potentially heading into trailer park trash territory.
It creeps up on you,slowly but surely, the clutter accumulates,if you do not assign a place for everything as soon as it enters the house it will haunt you for months as floor,bench,bed litter,I have baskets full of I'll deal with that later stuff...
The backyard becomes the graveyard of toys that no one cares about anymore & if it has a fire drum &your grass does not grow well & it's kind of muddy all the better for aesthetics.
My car in particular makes my cheeks burn with embarrassed shame,it is a write off, always messy with stuff nobody wants to bring inside & try to find a spot for.jackets,shoes,junk mail,rubbish,drink bottles& food scraps, although looking at that list makes me feel that if we ever broke down in the desert, our chances of survival are quite high according to Bear Grylls!
Having five children a automatically makes you semi trailer park & the fact those 5 children make it hard to shower as regularly & thoughly as you would like means you often have slightly greasy hair.
A once groovy dresser can now be found wearing strech jersey & trackpants because of their easy care labels & the cost of clothing five kids.
If you swear, I dare you not to with five kids.Your backyard is probably not the place for you can be assured that will be when the local dog walkers will walk past your house & think to themselves "trailer park",worse if you child swears back.

So what's the answer to this? Well either I pull my finger out go to the Dr get a script for Valium & see if that makes any difference to my house working skills or I dye my hair blond,find a husband named Earl & change my name to Joy...
What do you think?
 
 
Today I'm tackling the big issues...
Question of the day: now this may or may not be a real question but it's "were all madd here" so keep that in mind!
So just imagine that you busted your 4 yr old brushing the cat with his 17 yr old sisters toothbrush but since you had words with said 17 yr old this morning about not doing the dishes,you are seriously considering not telling her...would this be wrong?
Please share your thoughts below...
 
 
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"see how much he loves it I rub his tummy!"
Hey people's,Today's little rant is bought to you by a Western Australian politician who wants to overturn the Great White sharks protected status & perhaps start culling them.
Let's start at the beginning shall we? Yesterday the unfortunate news came through that a W.A surfer had been taken by a shark, most likely a Great White.
Now please do not get me wrong,my heart goes out to the family of this young man,it's a terrible tragedy that he was taken in such horrific circumstances,I cannot not nor would I wish to fathom the pain this family is in
BUT...
I do not for one second think that hunting down & killing the shark will make this situation any better for anybody but apparently there are people who think this may be a good idea & then there are other people like the W.A pollie who want to go a step further & overturn the sharks protected status with the option for a cull.
Living in a coastal town has given me plenty of acess to surfing culture & I can't think of any surfers who would want the shark hunted down & killed if this were to be their fate,the surfing community has & will always have a very strong environmental slant that basically decrees we are entering their domain,we take our chances because the ocean is a special force & nothing special is without risk.
Nearly everything comes with risk,we can minimize the risk bit never really remove it completely,wether it be driving,swimming,climbing,walking there is risk but if there is a car accident & someone is killed we don't cull the cars,if someone drowns, we don't drain all the pools,if a branch falls on someone we don't chop all the trees down & I feel the same about shark attacks we cannot kill all the sharks because they are a risk factor in enjoying the ocean,we must just factor them into the equation,weight up the risks,look at the stats (they are very low when you think about how many people enjoy the ocean every year) & then make an informed decision as to wether we want to enter the ocean or not.
I don't spend a great deal of time in the ocean anymore because I am shark phobic,they fucking terrify me but they also fascinate me & you can be sure I'll be the one reading,watching,listening to anything about them,come shark week on pay t.v you'll know where to find me ( yep at a friends with pay t.v) this is also why I don't do boating,fuck that boats sink....
The bottom line for me is sharks play an important role in the ocean & we have already put them under massive pressure with things like overfishing & pollution,I don't think culling them solves the problem it just lulls people into a false sense of security really...
I the scaredy cat of sharks don't want them hunted down or killed...what about you?
Please excuse punctuation & spelling I'm on my phone & I don't know how to spell wether in the right context (help me out?):)
 
 
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Hey guys,Today I'm diving straight in with my thoughts on a what could well become or is becoming a real issue with our kids...internet porn.
Now some of you will have already heard me express my concerns about this particular issue as it's something that I feel quite strongly about on a few levels & having teenagers has only brought it to the forefront.
I'll be the first to admit that I don't have a great deal of experience with porn,yes I watched "Debbie does Dallas" as a teen in the 80's on vhs at a party & flicked through a friends dads "Ribald" mags (holy crap),I even spent a lot of time reading penthouse articles at another friends who was by his own admission a pornaholic but to me it was always kinda seedy & dirty with the faint air of desperation.
Anyways as part of my research for this post I had a quick look on my phone free porn...geez! Well lets just say that there is plenty available & it is certainly free & it's totally what I would class as hardcore.
It seems to be that normal vaginal penetration is not enough anymore it's all about group sex,anal & degradation of the woman by verbal & physical means. The more I think about the sort of things I saw & they were just the tip of the iceberg,the more it freaks me out that young boys are growing up on a diet of this stuff well before they have any real experience of  sex with a girl & how does this alter their expectations of what real sex will be like?
How much more pressure does this put on young girls to live up to their boyfriends expectations? There was nothing romantic about what I saw.
Will this constant flow of hardcore desenstize our boys to "normal sex"? Will they keep pushing for more from the girls they are with & we all know there's always a girl who will do whats asked,regardless of if it's what she wants or not.
The stuff I saw showed a complete disregard for STD prevention (dude if it's been in your bum don't ever put it anywhwere else untill you've had a shower ewww)
Really, the point I think I'm trying to make with this post is our kids have 24hr a day access to this stuff nowadays & if you think for one minute that they are not watching this stuff you are only fooling yourself,primary school age kids can get to this stuff & will given half a chance,it's about teaching them about whats real life, whats fantasy & how to not blur the lines too much.
So how do we communicate all these things not only to our boys but our girls as well?
I don't know? I have spoken to mr16 a lot about this,I like to bring it up in the car,he's trapped so he has to listen but we don't have to look eye to eye so it's a bit easier & I was pretty straight up,I just said "I want you to know that most girls you have sex with will not want you to cum all over their face & they won't be comfortable with anal sex at least not in the first stages of a relationship maybe not ever & that he needed to respect that,girls in porno's get paid to do that stuff IT'S NOT REAL LIFE!"
I really don't know what the answers are but I do know that we as parents have to really bite the bullet & confront & discuss this with our kids regardless of how hard or embarrassing it may be,we need to help them understand that life ain't always what it seems in the movies & nor do we want it to be...at least I don't want my daughters thinking thats what they have to do/be to keep a boy interested! being a teenager sure aint getting any easier....
What are your thoughts on this issue?
Please excuse spelling